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| Hpathy Ezine - August, 2005 | ||||
Hell Is Right Here!Bobby's Case -- Elaine Lewis, DHom |
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| Editor's Note: The case below is
an online case. It does not cover the guidelines for a physical
case but we have included it to show the dynamics of virtual consultation.
This case has lot of grammatical, punctuation and spelling mistakes
which we have not corrected as we wanted the readers to give the
actual text typed by the person. The choice of words, the language,
the emphasis and the mistakes all give us some insight into the
psyche of the patient! On August 29, 2003 (8/29/03), Bobby posted on the Hpathy.com discussion board, asking for help with his anger. He ended each post with his signature line: "Hell is right here!" His case looked interesting, also it was clear that his life was in ruins due to a violent parent in the home during his childhood, so I felt the need to help him. I've shortened the case due to length. Please note that despite this being a "mental case", I started with a 12C potency twice a day in water and it worked "gently and rapidly" as homeopathy's founder, Samuel Hahnemann, would have liked, with no aggravation! Also note that the constitutional remedy did not cover the whole case; a second and third remedy were needed temporarily, after which we went back to the first. The advantage of daily prescribing is the ability to jump in when a new presentation occurs, neutralize it, and then go right back to the chronic case. *** hi, my names bobby and i just joined this forum. i have difficulty with anger control. is there a herb i can take to help me? thanx
[We need you to fill out the Adult Questionnaire.]
gosh ,thats a lot of questions!! do i have to answer all of them?is it not possible to simply tell why i feel angry all the time? 1) i was adopted when very small. 2)my adopted father was a mean and vicious s.o.b. 3)daily punishments for the slightest mistake 4)punishments included whipping with belt,rubber pipes,canes,tennis rackets ,shoes ,fists.........anything handy 5)beaten till he got tired 6)was not allowed to have friends or talk to anyone 7)was ridiculed all the time 8)confided once in someone who went and told him,after punishment never dared to confide in anyone again 9)would not cry in front of him ,no matter what he did which only made him more angry 10)afterwards ,would go and hide somewhere and cry for hours 11)tried to escape once ,was found and brought back 12)tried to commit suicide ,failed 13)turned to drugs,was addicted from first try 14)quit drugs ,turned to faith 15)now off drugs for 2 years 16)cant get over anger and resentment 17)keep feeling irritable and angry at people ,at life desperate to try something to help control my anger as it is always causing problems. hope this will help,if i still need to fill out the form ,please tell me thanx, bobby
[Please fill out the Questionnaire.]
First Name:bobby What is your chief complaint (CC)? Tell as much about it as you can. my main problem is my anger,i feel angry and resentful all the time . i also have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) which is also very frustating. i control my anger mostly but it requires immense effort on my part.when my emotions get out of control,i grit my teeth which helps .people say i look scary when im mad cos i start to glare and waves of tension flow from me .i try really hard to keep cool cos when i am mad ,i just want to destroy everything in front of me at that time.i want to smash everything,i want to scream, i want to abuse ,i want to hurt others like i ve been hurt. i get mad when i see people being unfair,i get mad when i cant give the right answer at the right time esp when i start to stutter,i get mad when someone cuts in front of me on the road(i usually dont allow them to get away with this) and people are scared to sit with me when im driving. i start to perspire and shake when im upset and i hate that ,i feel im a sissy,a weakling and that makes me more angry. ********************************** When did this problem begin? What happened in your life around that time? What do you think caused it? i think it was my entire life up to this present point.i hate my past,i hate myself for being weak and unable to handle myself ,i hate my stepdad,i hate the mother who left me,i hate the people who saw everything and closed their eyes,i hate all people who have children and dump them when they cant take care of them,if i could id pass a law ,i would sterilize all people who arent fit to have children.no one has the right to do what was done to me,to anyone else. ***********************************
i like cold weather the best ,i also like mild warm weather when you can go the beach.i hate muggy weather, i dont like rainy weather much,i feel miserable. i like to sit in my room and shut myself in when im upset,i dont like anyone talking to me then,i prefer to talk to god,whos a better friend ,i used to talk to god all the time from the time i was small,i used to pray it was a bad dream and id wake up and be somewhere else. *********************************** What position is most uncomfortable for you? sitting up straight,i like to slump down in my seat. lying on my back,arms and legs straight,cant stay that way for long. *********************************** Do you tend to be chilly or warm? i feel warm most of the time,i hate the heat ,i feel sticky and dirty. my whole body is always very hot,the worst are my hands and feet,people always think i have a temperature if i touch them. *********************************** Do you perspire a great deal? yes. all over ,but it is worse on my hands and feet,my shoes start to stink and become slimy after i wear them for a while . ********************************** What aggravates you? i feel lonely even with people around me,it is a deep sadness and pain which is difficult to explain. seeing people around me smiling,talking and interacting is very painful as i never seem to fit in but always seem to be looking on ,unable to express my feelings and thoughts and when i do, it is never appropriate and that makes me want to destroy everything around and in front of me . i withdraw myself ,talking to god always helps me feel better,gives me hope again,gives me courage again to go out and do battle. sometimes ,music helps but prayer never fails.i hate people staring at me, feel uncomfortable and selfconscious,feel like abusing /cursing then. *********************************** What's your worst time of day or night? daytime,esp when i have to go to places where i can see other people relaxed/having fun/chatting.i like the night , i feel peaceful then ,no noise,quiet,everyone asleep,i feel closer to god. *********************************** What else aggravates you? i start getting agitated when im disturbed in any way,i start to find it difficult to focus on anything,all i can do is feel then.anger,pain. i cannot handle confrontations,i go into fight/flight mode.i start to tremble internally ,i can feel my muscles start tiny tremors and i start to both sweat profusely and feel cold.i start to stammer and then i want to either run away asap or smash whatever is in front,person/thing.i get extremely disturbed. *************************************
i worry about failure ---most of all, i think about being always lonely,never learning the skills that come naturally in a natural enviroment.of never having someone to love me ,to be mine,to care for me.i try very hard but so far ,in all my life ,i have not succeeded at this goal. ************************************** How do you keep your house, your room, etc.? i am a very messy person but i like to keep my body clean always even if my surroundings are not. ************************************** How easily do you cry? In what situations? I hate to cry, I always try to control my emotions.only weak men cry.if it ever happens ,i do not let it be seen by anyone/go on for long. I cry when the pain inside me gets out of my control,even then i do not cry but my eyes keep flowing.i cannot ,even after so many years ,watch a scene of a child being punished. **************************************
i pray,i divert my attention ,i try to think of ways to improve my condition,to help myself. ************************************** What makes you angry? What do you do when you're angry? criticism,sarcasm,taunting,failure. i usually try to control myself,i grit my teeth,in a confrontation(something that always happens that makes me so mad that i want to kill someone) i feel as if my brain is paralyzed, i cannot think, i cannot respond,i panic and all i can think of is getting out of the situation or murdering the person whos doing this to me then.my limbs start trembling so much that i cannot walk or stand,or use my hands . i can feel my pulse ,my heart hammering ,i can physically feel the throbbing of my pulse in my neck ,my whole body gets rigid,and later my body keeps hurting.i break out in sticky sweat. another thing that makes me mad is that whoever is upsetting me can see exactly what im going through.i cannot hide anything im feeling,people say that whatever i feel is literally written on my face,my fear,my confusion,my panic.people tell me that my face can change in seconds from one emotion to the very opposite and it makes me hate that i cant hide my feelings. ************************************** Do you have an emotion that predominates? i feel resentful and angry,lonely and bitter,i cannot bear to see the people from my childhood without getting resentful and angry .i feel frustated at my life .i hate them for closing their eyes when i was helpless. ************************************** What fears do you have? i try not to fear anything.but i am always anxious.i am not afraid of dying,but i am afraid of being helpless,of being out of control. ************************************** What have been the most difficult circumstances in your life? How did you cope? my entire life has been one of struggle.i have tried to cope by praying and keeping hope and faith.i have tried to forgive but i cannot.god has comforted me when everything else has failed.poetry helps me to express my feelings in any form .i always try to end every poem on a note of hope .i read my poetry to see the difference in my life over the years. ************************************** what are the greatest joys you have had in your life? i cannot think of anything. ************************************* What was your childhood like? sad,very frightened,very lonely,very confused,very shy ************************************* What bothers you most in other people? How, if at all, do you express it? i feel contempt for people who complain about trivial things and cannot handle them,i feel resentful of people with normal lives,i feel disdain for people who cannot rise above their failures,who do not have the strength to struggle against all odds and not give up.unfortunately ,i cannot hide my feelings even if i keep silent.people sense it when i feel contemptous and they express it sometimes. *************************************** What causes the most problems in your relationships? desperate need to please ,to seek approval ,to be wanted,needed ,alternating with my dominating and aggressive nature.i have ocd and an addictive personality(i get addicted very easily). *************************************** What would you need to feel happy? to succeed in improving my life greatly,to be admired,to be respected,not be lonely,to be stable in my personality. *************************************** If you were made President for a day, what would you change? i would try to reduce the amount of pain everywhere.i would try to do something that would help children and women to be better protected.i would punish people for cruelty to children and animals. **************************************** When people have criticized you, what were they complaining about? Similarly, when people have praised you, what did you receive praise for? people say i have an attitude,that im rude,aggressive,impatient. most people admire me for my brains and persistence. **************************************** What would you like to change most about yourself? i want to change/undo my past which is impossible.id try to settle for being admired ,respected,liked,successful. ***************************************** How do you feel before, during and after meals? How do you feel if you go without a meal? i get angry when i have to wait for food. i like to eat,i have a pot belly which i hate cos im always eating. ***************************************** What would you most like to eat? ice cream all the time,oriental most of the time. ***************************************** How much do you drink in a day? i drink a lot of strong coffee,over 10 MUGS a day. ***************************************** How thirsty do you tend to get? i get violently thirsty sudenlly and i prefer ice cold water. **************************************** How is your sleep? i sleep like the dead ,but im always tired when i wake up after even full sleep. i snore very loudly,sometimes ,ive woken myself up to hear myself snorting loudly.i drool. ***************************************** How frequently do you get colds and flus? i get flu easily .before ,a sick person had to just pass by me and id get his illness.its much better now since a long time. ***************************************** Have you had any childhood illnesses twice, or in a very severe form, or after puberty? tonsills,flu.after puberty,chicken pox,mumps,measles. ***************************************** How do you feel after you've eaten? i feel ok ,guilty if ive been greedy cos im trying to shape up,if i try to go without a meal it gets very difficult to concentrate, so when i am able to control it ,i feel very pleased(it is rare ,though) ************************************* How dry or moist is your mouth--do you over or under-produce saliva? my mouth is usually very wet but my lips are always dry. ************************************** How much antibiotic use have you had in your life? too much ,there was a time when i had to take antibiotics regularly like vitamins just to be able to function,its much better now ,it used to happen before when i was much younger and severely stressed as well as spaced out ************************************** Do you speak hurriedly or slowly or neither? normally i speak very rapidly. *************************************** At night when you're sleeping, do you perspire? yes ,frequently *************************************** Do you throw the covers off or bundle up? i like to be covered at all times ,if its hot ,a light cover then but i feel very uncomfortable otherwise.when ive slept without covers ,ive felt very vulnerable and ended up catnapping in a curled up position **************************************** Do you have peaceful or restless sleep? i sleep very deeply but i always feel tired when i wake up,hence coffee **************************************** Any dreams you can relate to us would be helpful. i have very vivid ,multicoloured dreams on all kinds of themes.when i was small,i would keep dreaming i was running and something evil was chasing me and no matter how much i ran i couldnt escape ,mostly ,i always seemed to be running in glue.but i dont have these dreams now.i also used to dream of abuse but this is very rare now **************************************** How does your mind function when you're not angry? quite analytical if im not being subjective **************************************** Can you concentrate, make decisions, remember things, etc.? easily but they are usually not the best regarding people **************************************** Do you ever get to the sea shore? i used to but its been a while now **************************************** How do you feel there? peaceful,i like to listen to the waves but thats all ,i dont like to swim in the sea **************************************** Can you sleep with the lights out; does darkness present a problem for you? when i was small,i was petrified of the dark,then i grew up and i started to love the dark,now i like a little light so i can see everything ***************************************** How neatly do you dress? people say i dress very neatly ,my clothes are always pressed and clean even if they are not costly ****************************************** You said you have OCD? What are you obsessive and compulsive about? i keep changing the type of compulsion but i cant seem to avoid getting into one or another.worst is when im seeing someone,i cant keep away from that person,i keep making up silly excuses to call,to drop by,to pass her work/home place.if the person gets irritated , i start getting really depressed and frantic. once a relationship is over,i never go back no matter what but i cant forgive or forget either.i havent been out with anyone for a while but thats cos im afraid to trust anyone after my last breakup. now i find myself getting addicted to a type of food,and eating it day and night for months sometimes till i suddenly get fed up and stop totally ,after a short while ,its again something else. ****************************************** If you could go anywhere, where would you go? i think id like to travel all over the world esp europe and see different cultures,people. ****************************************** What do you love to do? id love to be rid of my hangups in life, to be in complete control of who i am , of what i choose and why i choose Thanx, bobby ******************************************* Bobby, what do you do for work? i work as an english teacher to foreign students and i also work part time as a volunteer in a welfare org for depressed folk i love music but it also depends on my mood.id say i love music and music can lift me up or bring me down acc to the situation. i dont know if this is important but i cannot get any peace even when i do not have people around me.mosquitoes will zoom in on me in a crowd of 100 ,and flies love to crawl on my skin. it gets very irritating even though i know this is a very minor thing. get bothered and irritable though keep reminding myself that im being irrational hope this isnt a silly point to mention. ***************************************** Family history? i have met my biological mother and acc to her,she was extremely depressed during the time she was carrying me. *********************************************** When you stand in line at the bank or supermarket, how do you feel? uncomfortable, self-conscious *********************************************** When a family member was last sick, what did you do? did my best to offer care and comfort *********************************************** How is your sexual energy? no complaints except for now. i love sex,but i find i also like to use sex to control my partner.no one ever complained about my sexual energy.i never had a problem getting sex,only had problems with finding care. *********************************************** How do you react to consolation? i feel patronized,i prefer to turn to god.at times, ill ask for comfort/sympathy if i trust the person . *********************************************** What part of your life do you have the most difficulty coping with? my adjustments,learning to give up my maladaptive habits,my aggression most of all. *********************************************** What are your hobbies? racing,reading anything i get my hands on ,net surfing,trying to self improve,(used to be) sex. *********************************************** Where would you go if you could go anywhere? anywhere,everywhere,i like travelling. thanx , bobby. ***************************************** Follow-up questions: What is your hair color? i have black hair. What foods are you hooked on now? chips,bisquits ( bit sweetish),toast,cake,spicy oriental foods,groundnuts,ice cream...bisquits ,sweet n salty....apples The perspiration during sleep--is it cold or hot? i guess its clammy so that means cold,the sweat is sticky and kind of oily,my face is covered in a mix of perspiration and oil when i wake up. Do you perspire on your forehead during sleep? i dont think so. You said you put no sugar in your coffee. Do you have an aversion to sweets, or is it just with the coffee? only coffee ,but generally ,i cant eat too much sweet ,i feel nauseus.but i can eat a lot of salt Does eating have any effect on the anger? it makes me feel better for a few min as long as im eating but as soon as i stop, its back and worse,the anger. ***************************************** More follow-up questions: The desire to be destructive, smash things, etc. that you talked about, is this something that you control or display? i do not display this in front of others but it requires immense self control to do so.as a child i did it (but rarely as the repurcussions were not worth it) only when i lost all control. Do you have a fear of dogs or any other animal? i do not fear most animals,only if the animal seems difficult to handle do i feel scared.i like dogs ,i fear snakes i think. Do you have a fear of going through tunnels? im not sure.i think not. Is there a reason why you don't like to swim in the ocean? i feel scared of the deep waters,i think if i start drowning no one maybe able to help me.i feel petrified even when the waters are clear and only 5-6 feet deep e.g.in a lagoon. Did you have brothers or sisters growing up with you? one sister and one brother. Were they abused too? yes . What would set your father off? anything ,nothing.he used to find it funny to hit us while passing,to run us down and humiliate us in front of strangers /visitors.he would come and hit me if he was in a bad mood to keep me "disciplined " even if i had not done anything at that specific time. Do you have any digestive complaints? none,i think i have a strong digestion i.e. rarely upset stomach but regular ,severe constipation. What is it about racing that appeals to you? to prove to myself that i can beat anyone and do anything.i like to take scary dares. Do you race cars, motorcycles? both. **************************************** More follow-up questions: I'm not sure that I understand what the problem is in the relationship with women. Could you explain more fully? my girlfriends said i was too demanding of them ,that i expected too much emotionally ,one said that i was too insecure and jealous,but i was never mean in a physical sense .i did not ever abuse them .i was always thinking of ways to make them happy,to please them ,seeking their approval ,i suppose that would explain it. my girls never said that i was selfish ,too possessive,just too demanding of them emotionally . breaking off was always the hardest part for me,even when all the signs were there for me to walk away.i would ignore all the signals and keep trying desperately to make things work out . i think then i was trying to avoid reality ,i would break off only when things reached a point when it would have been suicidal to continue for me for i used to get severely depressed everytime a relationship was not working out. the biggest insult was being called a clinging leech.refusing to let go.but it was the most apt. i still havent gotten over most of my past relationships and spend a lot of time hating them and myself.yet,i would never go back for the ending has been almost always very damaging,irrepairable. to go back would be like asking for a stab in the back.the end of almost every relationship has been when i just couldnt take it anymore and would explode like a coiled spring that had been building up tension for a long time. my most intense relationships would keep building up tension right from day one until i erupted like a volcano and then i just didnt care and would do anything to get rid of the person.my most intense relationships have been with girls who were equally or more disturbed ,who also came from severely dysfunctional families. all my life ive felt like a timebomb waiting to explode at some point.although thats not resulted in harm to anyone except myself everytime. except once when i used to take a lot of BS from someone who enjoyed picking on me .one day i just saw red and ended up breaking his legs.i just went totally nuts but i never attacked any of my girls.i used to yell sometimes but it was very rare and always due to an argument. i always apologized first.every time ,every single time. and i hate myself for this,for i did so even when i was in the right ,for i was so afraid of losing them. i dont know if this will be of any use but i like dogs and at the same time ,i am a bit scared of them.i always feel like they might attack at any moment.yet ,i still like dogs ,mainly becos i have always read of dogs being mans best friend and i always thought that a dog would never let me down.i am not scared to pet them if they are calm and i can hold puppies in my arms. sorry for giving you so much trouble, bobby. You are no trouble at all, not at all! I think I've decided on a remedy. It's been hard because I see Mercury here: The bleeding gums, the perspiration, the excessive antibiotic use; excessive saliva with thirst, and maybe you will at some point need Mercury as a remedy, but, I finally came down on the side of Anacardium. I thought about Staphysagria--ailments from abuse, and they certainly attract mosquitos and fleas. Maybe you will need Staphysagria at some point. What goes for Anacardium is this: 1. Ailments from humiliation and abuse; low self-esteem. 2. Anger, hate, resentment, desire for revenge, fits of rage. 3. Feeling estranged and separate from others. 4. Religious, and yet the impulse to commit unreligious-like acts. 5. Dreams of being pursued 6. History of alcohol and drug abuse 7. Constipation 8. All complaints are better by eating. 9. Frequent use of the words, "I hate...!" (Vasilis Ghegas) 10. The need to prove one's self, a need for praise and recognition. So, Bobby, if you want to try this, buy Anacardium 12C, put 1-3 pellets in a small, half-filled spring water bottle. A dose is a sip. Take 2 doses a day. Before each dose, succuss the bottle 10 times--that means, pound the bottle into your opposite palm. It's a little more specific than shaking. Let me know what reactions you're having to it so I can adjust the dosage to suit you.
9/13/03: i have bought the remedy and taken my first dose .so far , i just noticed that i feel less irritable. thank you, bobby
hi,its bobby again, just wanted to let you know that im taking the remedy and i feel calmer than before,less anxious,a little less hungry ,less aggressive compared to b4.the change is so subtle that i didnt realize it until now, when i sat down and started to think . i realized that since ive started the remedy ,ive not felt the need to race on the road. for the first time someone sat with me and did not feel scared of my road skills!! i did feel the need to move fast but i was not feeling the same way.its hard to put into words but i felt relaxed on the road and did not have the need to be pushy which is totally new to me. i feel a little scared of one thing,is it possible that i might get dependent ? i recall now that i started to feel sad today when i forgot to take it and after taking it ,i felt better after some time. thank you, bobby
[No, it's not addictive. A 12C is a low potency and we expect it to wear off and require frequent repetitions.]
hi,its bobby again, im really relieved to know its not addictive!! i felt a bit worried. im feeling even better today but i also feel a little emotional and teary.ive had to pretend a couple of times that i had something in my eye becos i suddenly felt so emotional for nothing!! i dont want to turn into an emotional weakling even if i feel better. i was angry b4 and now i feel very soft. i dont want to become soft........i dont want to become weak. i feel emotionally barely aggressive compared to b4 but i am worried about this change. thank you , bobby.
10/3/03: hi,its bobby again. the medicines amazing,i feel much better than i have in a very ,very long time.i noticed that the remedy was starting to slow down again.should i start the new potency now? so far,i feel less depressed,im more controlled.i still get angry easily but i cool down very soon unlike before when i would boil for days,now its a matter of hours only.im not eating much.the need is not like before,i eat only when i feel like it.ive lost weight and ive started to work out. but im sweating terribly and i noticed that the bugs are even more attracted to me than ever before!!my sweat seems like a sweetish type of smell. thanx, bobby
Please tell me: 1. how severe is the constipation now? still there but not half as bad... 2. Are you still crying uncontrollably and having to cover it up? sometimes... 3. Are your lips still dry? very.... 4. Are you still salivating excessively? yes... 5. Are you still stuttering? very rarely.... 6. Are you still drinking 10 cups of coffee a day? only half as much as before..... 7. Are you still driving aggressively? i still cant get out of the habit of driving very fast and very roughly but no ,its not at all as aggressive....nothing like before..... i noticed that my gums have started to rot around the edges near the teeth,kind of like white stuff....and i have started to crave fags again...i had quit smoking about 6 months back but now its back again ,i just keep hankering for a fag and finally i gave in to it.i think its cos i worry a lot about different things and i have started to feel tired again most of the time....i started the next medicine but it seems like it has stopped working for im starting to crave food again all the time .i want to take the next medicine but i am not sure which one as the last isnt working....should i just move onto the next one?i have the 30 one now to use....i noticed that when im worried if i take a few doses consecutively real soon ,i feel better... 10/17/03: hi,its bobby again, the sweating is really bad,its absolutely terrible,just drips esp when im even a bit stressed or anxious.then even the anac doesnt help.is there anything i can take to stop the sweating?and the bugs also keep chewing me.... thanx, bobby
10/17/03: im taking Anacardium 30 c now,how often can i take it?is there a limit? thanx,bobby
Bobby, stop the Anacardium. I want to try Mercurius 30C as an intercurrent remedy to try to stop the gum disease and other Mercury symptoms that you have, including sweating, salivating and dryness of the lips.
10/24/03: hi,its bobby again, i have got an old ,old fungal infection that has come out on the soles of my feet.it itches terribly. shall i take the remedy even then?
Hi Bobby, This is a very good sign that an old symptom has popped back out! We look for this in homeopathic treatment and are always glad to see it. Let me just clarify that the reason we are glad to see an old symptom like a rash reappear is because, especially in Anacardium, suppression of eruptions is often the cause of this state, the Anacardium state. When the rash comes back to the surface, it is evidence that the immune system, now strengthened, has thrown this disturbance out of the deeper, vital organs and back to the skin where it can do no harm other than be an annoyance. Usually this "Return Of Old Symptoms" lingers for a few days and then disappears. It's Mercurius. The whole case now seems to be Mercurius. Can't you go to the health food store and get some right away rather than waiting for it to arrive in the mail? You really need to start Mercurius right away. Please stay in touch so we can find out what happens with the 4 mercury symptoms that you have now: fungal rash on feet gingivitis excessive salivation excessive perspiration If for some reason Merc. aggravates the problem, stop the remedy and let me know. Otherwise, take it in water with succussions before each dose 3 times a day and let me know how you're doing in a few days.
10/26/03: hi,its bobby again, the fungal rash has suddenly gone away all by itself.should i take mercury still?
10/27/03: I thought there was the possibility that this would happen, though not quite so dramatically! Please answer the questions below: 1. Do you still have a desire to smash things? sometimes i still do.but its very rare now. 2. Are you still stammering? no,i sometimes have difficulty getting words out but i dont stammer. 3. Do you still have road rage? no :) 4. Are you still friendless? yes 5. Do you still have chronic fatigue? i am now having problems sleeping,but surprisingly i dont feel that tired even ,esp compared to before. 5. Are you still gritting your teeth and glaring? i dont grit my teeth but i still glare at times. 6. Are you still consumed with hatred? its still there but its not as painful. 7. Are you still very hot? very 8. Are you still messy? yes :) 9. Are you still lonely? extremely. 10. Are you still praying? always. 11. Still have desire for ice cream and ice cold water? no,dont feel thirsty at all,have to remind myself to drink water. 12. Still waking tired? yes,constantly. 13. Still speaking rapidly? yes,but making a conscious effort to curb it.:)
10/28/03: hi,its bobby again, just wanted to say that i got the mercury and have started it.the saliva seems less,but my skin is very dry and peeling on my hands and feet (before the mercury even) ,i have also been getting angry ,red acne type boils which have watery pus ,this at once improved after the first dose of mercury :) also,my lips are very dry and i find myself constantly licking my lips to moisten them.my mouth is very full of saliva still,its funny. i dont feel thirsty at all,not even the slightest bit.i actually have to force myself to drink water for my healths sake. thank you, bobby
[I thought Bobby was "proving" Mercury (taking on the symptoms of Mercury-overdose) and told him how to antidote it. To learn how to antidote a remedy that's aggravating, read my interview with Diane Fuller in the Nov. '04 ezine]
11/11/03: hi,its bobby again, i took the mercury antidote just as you said to and i started to feel better right away:),im still having the dry skin problem though plus the old symptoms.i have started to take the anacardium again as i noticed i was starting to feel angry again at even small things.that became better at once after i took it.maybe,i shouldnt take anything else.ive never seen any miracle before happening in my life and i dont want to lose it now..... thank you, bobby
11/21/03: hi,its bobby again, im taking anacardium only now as i didnt know what else to do.i have again got the fungal infection,it comes and goes by itself.my energy level is definitely improving daily :-) i havent felt so energetic in a long time. a few new symptoms have risen.i feel very angry at times ,although it is never overwhelming,yet it keeps smouldering within and i have to keep it under check at all times. it is a different kind of anger than before [my emphasis].it is more emotional and bitter,resentment and fury at the past.i sometimes feel very,very sad and at other times,mostly,i feel very angry,i feel hatred and resentment at the people who did what they did to me.i know it is of no use yet i cannot stop it.i also feel very restless,i dont sleep much even if i am tired for when i go to bed,i keep recalling unpleasant stuff so i avoid going to bed as much as possible. i do not have road rage anymore though, and i find it easier than before to deal with strangers.im trying very hard to overcome my lack of confidence.but i find my anger targeting the past now [new presentation].also i find myself avoiding anything that reminds me of the past as it is very difficult at this moment to handle it. thank you,bobby.
[I told Bobby to switch to Nitric Acid, which is covered in the Repertory by the following rubrics: Dwells on past disagreeable occurrences Hatred of persons who had offended him. Also, it is similar to Mercury--has gum disease and a lot of sweating!]
12/14/03: hi,its bobby again, sorry i have not posted for a while.i started taking nit ac some time back for anger at past injustices.it made a big improvement to me mentally...i went back to anacardium (200C) and now i have noticed that some old symptoms briefly flare up then die down e.g. my fungal infection but it never stays for long.it is always on my feet and always the same type. [I told Bobby to stop taking Anacardium if it's working and only repeat if he detects a relapse. A 200C potency generally lasts a number of weeks without need of repetition; but, every person is different, so, the operant phrase here is: as needed!] i have not had road rage now for a very long time.i find it hard to believe that i actually do not have the desire to confront everyone around me.others now find it hard to adjust to my driving but in a very different way :-) i still have problems sleeping sometimes but not very often.only if i am very stressed or anxious if i have something really important the next day. i am more relaxed now and have tried to meet people more although i have not been able to find a girl yet to go steady with.but i am more confidant now about myself and feel less anxious around people. thank you,bobby
Are you still dwelling on past injustices against you? How is the gum disease and sweating?
12/23/03: i am not dwelling consciously any more on the past. the gum disease and sweating have gone :) i have taken an online homeopathy course ..............homeopathy has been the biggest miracle in my life:) hell looks better every day....... thank you ,bobby ********************************************* One of the last things Bobby did before leaving the discussion board for good was changing his signature line to: "the lord works in mysterious ways"
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Elaine Lewis, DHom, CHom takes online cases. Visit her website at: www.hpathy.com/office/ElaineLewis.asp |
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